Tuesday, May 24, 2016

I'm Angry

Can I be honest with you?  I'M ANGRY!  So, so often I am absolutely angry.  I'm angry about a lot of different things.  I'm angry that I still live in the city even though I've wanted to move for years.  I'm angry that I have a few neighbors that are complete asses.  I'm angry that I have a former friend saying crap behind my back even though I have said absolutely nothing.  I'm angry that I'm broke every month.  I'm angry that I've needed new shoes since LAST YEAR but can't afford them.  I'm angry that I can't give my kids things they want because of not having money.  I'm angry that I blow my back out whenever I pick up my kids because of this dumb back injury.

I'm angry.  You could say I'm having a moment of weakness here.  But I can't sit here and act like everything is OK because, no, I'm NOT OK.  I'm sorry if no smile is thrown your way but I'm exhausted. 

"God, are you avoiding me? Where are you when I need you?"  You ever feel that way?  Well if you do, then at least you're in good company.  The bible, especially in the book of Psalms, is full of people that are angry, upset, overwhelmed, and plain done.  Don't believe that watered-down "everything is awesome" fluff you hear on Christian radio. "The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows.  It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it."  I think that's one of the realest quotes to ever be written in a movie.  Life is difficult.  Life will hit you hard.  Life will make you angry.  It's what you choose to do then, when you're down, that matters most. 

I can't say it any better than Rocky Balboa did: "If you know what you're worth then go out and get what you're worth!  But you gotta be willing to take the hits and not point fingers saying you ain't where you want to be because of him or her or anybody!  Cowards do that and that ain't you!  You're better than that!" 

So... Be angry.  Be mad.  Yell.  Scream.  But don't forget to GET BACK UP!  FIGHT!  TELL LIFE TO BRING IT!  And realize YOU ARE NOT ALONE in this struggle.  I'm with you.  And there are others with you as well.  Stand up and give life a black eye for knocking you down.  You're not a survivor.  You are a conqueror.  An ANGRY conqueror!


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